Carrot 2 what i want is a comedy show

inimicaldolly:

artemuscainpotato:

eversolewd:

havocados:

In the future they’re gonna sell you air and you’re gonna fuckin buy it.

The lorax is a prophecy

When I worked at a movie theater. A woman bought her stuff at the concession stand on one of those days that had a lot of people at the theater, but it wasn’t “busy”

After finishing the transaction she said “If you don’t mind me asking, are you familiar with The Bible?”

Without wishing to offend and get myself another write up I said “Yes, but not as much as I should.”

She smiled and said “In the book of revelations it says the end times will come when every man has a number given to them and water is sold and bought. Kind of like bottled water and Social Security and Credit cards.”

After some seconds I absentmindedly asked “Well… should we not do things like that?”

She shrugged. “It’s prophecy. No use trying to go against it.” She then wished me well and went on her way.

I didn’t sleep well for the next few weeks.

oh

sketchamagowza:

present (has this been done before? There’s no way to look up a visual gag like this…)

accelgor:

green mario

unclefather:

tylerchokely:

im kinda turned on by mr clean

image

getsuga:

PERSONA4: THE ULTIMAX ULTRA SUPLEX HOLD (PERSONA 4 ARENA: ULTIMAX)
↪ ペルソナ4 ジ・アルティマックスウルトラスープレックスホールド
可愛い菜々子はにも渡さん!鋼のシズコン番長  Hero (Narukami Yu) - Trailer

bogleech:

bugcthulhu:

zooophagous:

astronomy-to-zoology:

Bat Tick (Carios kelleyi)

…a species of soft tick that is distributed throughout parts of North America, mainly Canada and the United States although it has also been found in Costa Rica. Like other soft ticks this species is a parasite of bats, as suggested by its name. Although they are also known to parasitize other animals including humans. Unlike other members of Argasidae C.kelleyi larvae are slow-feeding and take weeks to engorge.

Phylogeny

Animalia-Arthropoda-Chelicerata-Arachnida-Acari-Parasitiformes-Ixodida-Argasidae-Carios-C.kelleyi

Image(s): Keir Morse

Ticks are literally the worst animals

That is a terrible lie and YOU KNOW IT IN YOUR HEART

Some other bat ticks only feed on bat guano as adults, but their babies still need blood, and to stay safe, only feed intermittently.

Every day their mother carries them all up the wall of the cave, waits while they feed on a sleeping bat, then carries them all back down.

matatagihayato:

please watch devilman

zreserve:

that’s horror

me in 5th grade
©